I speak for myself when I say I don’t like violence and I don’t hate anyone. There are bad elements in all groups. I have encountered people on the left who could only be described as blunt instruments. Those people, who claim to be on the side of social justice and compassion but speak and act with the same rhetoric as common street thugs, are ones I avoid. I’ve known a few violent people in the activist community, and although violence ultimately makes for the most damaging optics on the part of the left, what keeps interested parties at bay is that the demand for a puritanical level of political correctness. They rival the stereotypical churchgoers so many of them mock.
Language and tone policing in leftist circles often goes too far. Someone got kicked out of a meeting for quoting a theorist who (they didn’t know this) had made transphobic comments. I was once checked for making a remark about Donald Trump’s mother; the tattler made me sound like a Floridian pornographer and it got ridiculous. I did take pause and evaluate my own choice of words, but I had comrades telling me they thought the situation stunk of liberal privilege. I wouldn’t call a move like that fascist, but rather authoritarian. My issue is when people oppress others, regardless of their political leaning. I’ve seen state governments that are mostly Republican and those that are mostly Democratic, and frankly, the oppressor comes in all shapes and sizes. The oppressor can be an asshole with a bright yellow combover or a witch in a pantsuit.
Antifa organizations have no central governing body, so I think it is unfair to make sweeping statements about anti-fascism as an ideology. From what you said, it seems that you take a greater issue not with the ideology of antifa, but rather in how this ideology is executed. That is totally fair. I don’t like this stream of street battles that have taken place. It doesn’t accomplish anything positive. People get hurt, arrested, and doxxed LARPing in the name of what they think is the only way. Talking is too much effort, so they punch, then go back to their keyboards.
Stay in touch.